I consider myself to be a fairly intelligent person (usually!), but when I came across the writings of Kyle Cupp, I knew I was encountering a profound and creative thinker who is way out of my league. Loyola Press is honored and pleased to present his first book with us, Living by Faith, Dwelling in Doubt – A Story of Belief, Uncertainty and Boundless Love.
Kyle not only believes that faith and uncertainty can exist side by side, but through the wrenching story of his new-born daughter’s death, he shares his journey from certainty to a shaken yet strong faith.
I was touched by this anecdote of attending an Easter Vigil with his wife and baby son:
For the first part of the Mass, I hid away until he fell asleep in my arms, then I stood in the hallway and narthex, swaying with soft steps to keep him calm and resting. He breathed into my shoulder with that whimper babies make when falling asleep after a long cry. I stood in the hallway where I could hear the prayers and songs of the Mass and follow along. Genece was assigned to sing the alleluia, and as I had hoped, I was able to hear her.
My arms and back ached from holding my very heavy son, but I held him close, absorbing the heat from his head and body, hearing his sad but quieting breath, and listened to my wife sing of her love for God. The moment was awesome in the richest sense of the word. As glorious as my wife sounded, her prayer would not have been as sublime and beautiful and heavenly had I sat alone comfortably in a seat.
I felt love wash over me: love for my sleeping son, love for my singing wife, and love for the God whose praises we sang. I felt enthusiastic with love and intimately close to my son, my wife, and my God.