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God’s love

Blog-alogue, the third

by Paul on May 14, 2009

heartSo, on day three of the First Annual People For Others Blog-alogue, Tom throws one of my questions back at me. He thinks maybe he’s going to catch me flat-footed?

How do you know that God loves you?

Tom,

Morristown, New Jersey.  About 9:00p.m. on a sultry June evening in 1993.  I am in the chapel of the Loyola House of Retreats spending some quiet and decidedly undramatic time before the Blessed Sacrament.

Suddenly, but again without any drama whatsoever, I was inundated with a deep-felt knowledge and awareness that God truly is my “Abba.”  My daddy.  God, I understood, is crazier in love with me than the proud father of a newborn baby — boundlessly and unconditionally embracing my every atom, my thoughts, memories and feelings.  

For most of my life, my assent to God’s love was an intellectual exercise and I glimpsed this love only in fleeting and tantalizing moments. I prayed for decades to fully experience God’s love and, like peace in Northern Ireland, decided it just wasn’t going to happen.  God had other plans, of course, and the grace was granted to me in New Jersey of all places. [Not that there's anything wrong with NJ!]

I think of my life in “Before Morristown” and “After Morristown” terms.  It was, without question, the most important thing that has ever happened to me. It was as if, having viewed the world in two-dimensional black and white, I suddenly began to see everything in glorious multi-dimensional Technicolor.

In the 16 years since it happened, I have never experienced anything like it again, but I have never for one single moment doubted that God loves me more than I can begin to imagine.

Could it have been an illusion and could I still be delusional about it all?  Sure, anything is possible.  I choose to believe that it is the most prefect and precious gift I ever received.  My own Copernican Revolution.

Paul

Blog-logue!, Blog-alogue, part deux, Blog-alogue, IV

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Blog-alogue, Part Deux

by Paul on May 13, 2009

tom-mcgrathWelcome to the second day of the First Annual People for Others Blog-Alogue (blog dialogue). Today my colleague Tom McGrath, author of Raising Faith-Filled Kids and co-author with Bret Nicholaus of The Meal Box, responds to my question with another question. Clearly he’s been hanging around Jesuits too long. Tom writes: 
  
Paul:
 
You got our blog-alogue off to a great start by responding to my question, “What’s the one personality trait in St. Ignatius that you most admire?”  Constancy? That’s a great quality to raise up in a culture that likes to keep it’s options open.
 
One of the questions you put to me connects to a trait I admire in Ignatius so I’ll give that one a whack. You asked, “How do you know God loves you?” Not to get too Bill Clinton on you, but it depends on the meaning of “know” y’know? I struggled with the essence of the question of trusting in God’s love for many years until I accepted that there are many ways of knowing beyond the cerebral. Once I was willing to give credence to the wisdom of my body, my intuition, my heart and my soul I realized I have always known God’s love. The main question is whether I will accept it or not.
 
Which brings me to Ignatius. The trait I admire most in him was his willingness to question his own mental processes and to explore and integrate what he learned from his emotions, his desires, the whole range of his experiences. For someone with a reputation as a cerebral sort, Ignatius offers a great method of welcoming the whole person, fully human and fully alive.
 
So, Paul, how do you know God loves you? Inquiring minds want to know.
 
Tom

Blog-logue!, Blog-alogue, the third, Blog-alogue, IV

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